Wastepaper Basket Fire
Words by Brian Dewan

Everybody stop what you're doing This is an emergency Flames are flaring, smoke is rising, Everyone come and see Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Try to smother it with that raincoat over by the windowsill Fill up every paper cup and empty every inkwell Douse it with a pot of coffee, lest it overcomes us Evacuate before the room becomes a fiery furnace Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Do not attempt to save expensive pieces of equipment Try to keep a level head through all of this excitement Climb onto the fire escape and do as you're instructed to Leave behind all articles of sentimental value Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire The culprit has come forward, who confesses to have failed To snuff his still-lit cigarette end he threw the rubbish pail We will give him 40 lashings, lock him in the pillory, And shame him in the public square for everyone to see Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire Fire, fire, fire, fire Wastepaper-basket fire