The Richter Scale Words by J. Kent Clark © 1981, music by Elliott DavisC F C G Charlie Richter made a scale for calibrating earthquakes C F C G Gives a true and lucid reading ev'ry time the earth shakes C F Increments are exponential; numbers O to 9 F C G C When the first shock hit the "seismo", everything worked fine C It measured one-two (1.2) on the Richter scale G A shabby little shiver One-two on the Richter scale C A queasy little quiver Waves brushed the seismograph F As if a fly had flicked her C One-two on the Richter scale; G C It hardly woke up Richter Nineteen-hundred thirty-three and Long Beach rocked and rumbled Schoolhouse walls and crockery and oil derricks stumbled Hollywood got hit but good; it even shook the stars Shattered glass and spilled martinis on a hundred bars It measured six-three on the Richter scale It rattled tile and plaster Six-three on the Richter scale A rattling disaster Waves bounced the seismograph As if a cue had clicked her Six-three on the Richter scale; It almost rattled Richter Came the turn of County Kern; the mountains lurched and trembled Bakersfield, which jerked and reeled, was almost disassembled Arvin town was battered down in rubble and debris Spasms racked the women's prison at Tehachapi It measured seven-eight on the Richter scale It fractured rails and melons Seven-eight on the Richter scale It fractured female felons Waves smacked the seismograph; A casualty inflicter Seven-eight on the Richter scale; It almost fractured Richter Came a cataclysmic quake at Anchorage, Alaska "Seisims" ran from Ketchikan to Omaha, Nebraska Polar bears were saying prayers; the tidal wave was grand Planted boats in California way up on the sand It measured eight-five on the Richter scale It loosened kelp and corals Eight-five on the Richter scale It loosened faith and morals Waves bashed the seismograph As if a mule had kicked her Eight-five on the Richter scale; It failed to loosen Richter Someday - pretty soon, we fear - our many faults will fail us Slide and slip and rip and dip and all at once assail us Seismic jolts, like lightning bolts, will flatten us that day When the concrete settles down, geologists will say: It measured eight-nine on the Richter scale It rocked them in Samoa Eight-nine on the Richter scale It cracked like Krakatoa Waves crunched the seismograph Just like a boa constrictor Eight-nine on the Richter scale; It really racked up Richter!