The Hunting Song Words and music by Tom LehrerI always will remember, 'Twas a year ago November, I went out to hunt some deer On a morning bright and clear. I went and shot the maximum the game laws would allow. Two game wardens, seven hunters, and a cow. I was in no mood to trifle, I took down my trusty rifle And went out to stalk my prey. What a haul I made that day. I tied them to my fender, and I drove them home somehow, Two game wardens, seven hunters, and a cow. The law was very firm, it Took away my permit, The worst punishment I ever endured. It turned out there was a reason, Cows were out of season, And one of the hunters wasn't insured. People ask me how I do it, And I say, "There's nothin' to it, You just stand there lookin' cute, And when something moves, you shoot!" And there's ten stuffed heads in my trophy room right now, Two game wardens, Seven hunters, And a pure-bred Guernsey cow.