The Cripple's Shield Wall
Words and music by Leslie Fish © 1991

Consider the plight of the one legged knight As he braces his crutch with his shield; He'll stand still and wait 'til you come for the bait Then you'll find that the bastard won't yield. Do you knock his one leg down, there's still no relief He'll crawl down the field with his sword in his teeth And the reach of his sword arm defies all belief When he fights in the Cripple's Shield Wall. Beware the old dame who's arthritic and lame So knee sprung she barely can stand; For her hands and her eye are still steady and spry She's the best crossbow shot in the land. With a repeating crossbow and war arrow blade She can pierce any armor that's ever been made Be glad she's not drawn to the highwayman's trade-- She just fights in the Cripple's Shield Wall. No profit you'll find from the knight who is blind He can hear you twelve paces away He'll listen off hand 'til he's sure where you stand Then his bill hook reaps far more then hay. He can fight in the forest, the river, the plain With his hearing unhampered by dark, fog or rain He must know his ground, but he'll sure bring you pain As he fights in the Cripple's Shield Wall. Pray do not go near the knight who can't hear Though he can't tell command calls at all He reads signs from his friends, and his post he defends With a lightning-fast seven-foot maul. They say when it's whirling it raises a breeze, And the head on its chain has been known to break trees, So when he starts swinging, the prudent man flees Where he fights in the Cripple's Shield Wall. Watch out in the fight for the cripple armed knight Whose hand can't swing up only down For he'll watch through the dance 'til he spies a good chance Then his downstroke will cost you your crown. His shield arm will raise up his sword arm and then He'll watch for his chance with his downstroke again You know that he'll strike but you never know when; And he fights in the Cripple's Shield Wall. Beware, I implore, all you masters of war Who prefer to draft healthy young boys For the blind, halt, and the lame can be good at this game When well placed, defending the toys. They've learned their art well, and they strike hard and true, If they've something to prove, then they'll prove it on you! The last line on Earth that you'd want to drive through You can swear is the Cripple's Shield Wall. Beware of the Cripple's Shield Wall!