Snakes Words and music by Cynthia McQuillin © 1986G C G D G A pretty maid, I was employed by a goddess that I knew. C G D My lovely hair was long and fair; no finer tresses grew. G C G D G And so, King Neptune was entranced by my beauty and my hair. C G D G But old Neptune proved to be my ruin, for the goddess caught us there. G G7 Oh, snakes, why’d it have to be snakes? C G They’re driving me quite mad, D For they snap and hiss and writhe and squirm – G D G Even toads wouldn’t be as bad. I haven’t washed my head for years, and the itch makes me insane. Is psoriasis much worse than this? The scaling is a pain. And, once a year, they shed their skins. My god, they’re testy then! They bite and snatch if I try to scratch. To the curse there is no end. Chorus But nighttime is the worst of it, for I cannot lie down. They’d all be dead if I laid my head on a pillow or the ground. And my poor back is killing me, so you mortal fools beware. Don’t ever chance my stony glance, or my temper’s sure to flare. Oh, snakes, why’d it have to be snakes? They’re driving me quite mad, For they snap and hiss and writhe and squirm – Even toads wouldn’t be as bad. Even toads wouldn’t be as bad.