Scans To Argo
Words by Mark Mandel (and a good many other people)
TTTO Banned From Argo by Leslie Fish

When we looked through into our repertoire of songs we'd known for years We soon discovered something that confirmed our darkest fears: No matter what the scansion, tempo, meter, mood, or rhyme, They all assimilated to the same atrocious crime. Because they... Scan to "Argo", every one! When you hear that tune, you know you'd better run. Two-hundred-fifty parodies, or maybe three- or four-, But nothing's safe from "Argo" any more. O beautiful for spacious skies, for amber waves of grain. One wants to rule the world, the other is insane. Allons, enfants de la patrie, le jour est arrivé. (Let me) tell you the story of a man named Charlie on a tragic and fateful day. Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, How many roads must a man walk down? When you land on Bailey's 7 you may not like what you see, This land was made for you and me. Jamye Dawson was the captain of the Christian and her crew And they thought they had a ship that the water would never get through. Yippee-i-ay, yippee-i-oh, ghost riders in the sky How many of them can we make die? Twelve thousand, half-million, million and more He stole from the rich and he gave to the poor. Robin Hood, Robin Hood, riding through the glen, He ran till he came to his cozy den. Adon olam, asher malach. The blind piper played at lakeside and it echoed o'er the Loch. Freude, schöner Götterfunken, Tochter aus Elysium, Dysprosium and scandium and cerium and cesium. They scan to "Argo", every one! When you hear that tune, it's much too late to run! I've murdered twenty songs in just three verses, maybe four, But nothing's safe from "Argo" any more. (Never was!)