Calm Down
Words and music by Kathy Mar © 1985


    D			  G
The Techies have invaded; they're everywhere you look,
     F		    A
And every conversation is a dull computer book
     D		     G
They rant about Assembly and rave of memories.
    F			         A
I'd love to find some way to tell them I don't speak Technese.

	Chorus:
	     G                        D
	Calm down, it's only ones and zeroes;
	     C                        A
	Calm down, it's only bits and bytes.
	     C                       G
	Calm down and speak to me in English;
	       F                                        A
	Please realize that I'm not one of your computerites.

They stand around for hours, as I'm sure you've seen and heard;
But only other Techies understand a single word.
With firmware, hardware, software, beware—never turn your back:
The guy you thought was liveware is another Techie hack.

	Chorus

The Techie faction's growing, the day may be at hand
When everyone must learn Technese by government command.
I'd rather be a renegade and speak in rhyme and verse:
Technese is bad for everyday; their poetry is worse.

	Chorus

I think I'll learn to program, and when I know it well
I'll rearrange each mainframe clear from here to Hacker's Hell.
It may take me a lifetime, but when I'm finally through,
The damned computers all will talk like normal people do.

	Chorus (expanded version):
	     G                        D
	Calm down, it's only ones and zeroes;
	     C                        A
	Calm down, it's only bits and bytes.
	     C                       G
	Calm down and speak to me in English;
	  F                                    A
	Unless you want to sleep alone through all your future nights
	     F                                 A
	I've had enough and one more word will cause some awful fights
	       F                           A                      D
	Please realize that I'm not one of your computerites, oh, no.