Blubber Words and music by Kay Shapero © 1993Upon a beach in merry Oregon With a hey and a hi and a merry merry-o. There died a whale that weighed eight ton With a hey and a hi and a ho. This whale did span full five and forty feet With a hey.." And raised a stench no one could beat With a hey..." Oh who will come and save us from this stink? The Highway Engineers, we think. The engineers came quickly without fail But couldn't budge the eight ton whale. One engineer surveyed the dismal sight And then suggested dynamite. They'd blow that whale to pieces very small Then leave the gulls to eat it all. So half a ton of merry dynamite That crew piled up and did ignite. The whale exploded in a blast of flame The watchers cheered to see the same. As we all know, it really doesn't do To disregard what Newton knew. One woman cried out and her voice was awed "Here comes a chunk of - OH MY GOD!" The watchers turned to flee the deadly hail Of tank-sized chunks of blown up whale. The blubber splattered objects near and far It crushed the top of someone's car. The pieces rained down over land and sea While cam'ras caught it for TV. The fetid whale meat covered half a mile And made that beach smell really vile. (To a variation on Kilkelly, Ireland.. by way of Kilkenny...) There was whale on the beaches And whale on the cars And gen'rally, whale everywhere... (back to the usual tune) What gulls remained were in a state of shock To eat THAT mess would take a Roc! Just what was done to clean up from the show I must confess I do not know. But there are those who'd pay them quite a fee With a hey and a hi and a merry merry-o To go clean Washington, DC. With a hey and a hi and a ho!
